Not sure if this is more morbid or sad but, when Jack LaLanne dies, that juicer company is totally going under. Sell your stocks now! Here's two good wikipedia inserts about Mr. LaLanne and the juicer company.

[LaLanne admits that as a child he was addicted to sugar and junk foods. He was very troubled and prone to rages, which led to his attempting to burn down his family's house, as well as chasing his brother with an axe.]

[The "Juice Tiger", however, was recalled in March 1996 after "14 incidents resulting in at least eight lacerations to the hands, face, arms, and chest and one permanent eye injury."]

You must really fucking suck at making juice to cut open your chest - fo' real.